Why I am going on a walk

26 Dec 2016

Note: This was posted on my new walking journal which can be found here. The other site is as purely a personal experience dump. The final day post with closing thoughts can be found here.

On the 21st I wrote a rather long post to my friends. For myself it has been a long time coming. I think it was towards the end of October a few people could get a sense of what was going to come. Except for myself this goes back further. This goes back farther than my frustrations of not being taken seriously or dismissed when disclosing vulnerabilities and security flaws I found at the airlines and other transportation systems; farther than my days of looking at privileged BrownU kids get wasted in preppy suits on the weekends; farther than zoning out in my classes in high school wondering if I would ever survive and leave the Midwest.

It’s odd I’m this way: I was raised to be a Democrat in a blue city. Yet I was ignored on issues that no one else wanted to speak up on, always feeling I was second class and not viewed as an equal in bodies of whiteness. I identified for years as Libertarian in my frustration yet realised it was the same exact problem. In the end I was simply a diversity token that was conventional until I began to speak. I did look into other parties yet now only identify as an independent.

Laws made to enforce restrictions on us and divide us, enforce silence and cause violence leading to human rights violations, take away our civil rights and liberties, our privacy, freedom, and so forth, they’re passed and supported by members of all major parties. It is a lie to claim so otherwise. No party is clean. Related I’ve also gone from thinking neutrality was the best approach in life to being clear on my stances because I’ve discovered true neutrality does not exist. It’s a lie and disservice to oneself to believe so. You are not being clean by remaining silent.

So why am I going on a walk I keep getting asked.

I really need this walk for myself to clear my head.

I recognise it’s alarming people I’m giving away all of my things.

No, I am not Skylar.

No, this is not me giving up.

Instead doing this is an affirmation and confirmation that I believe and I’m still in love with the world.

I am going on a walk because I believe we are not facing the impossibles. The media, politicians, and laws being passed, may make it feel like it is unapproachable, that nothing can be done, that nothing will ever change, that it is too late. They aim to have us feel apathetic towards the alarming and unethical targeting of vulnerable communities with fear and hatred. This is done to leave us defenseless, attack one another, divide us even further.

Human rights are universal and inalienable.

I believe in the resistence.

Going on this walk I will not be tied down to any single physical place. I’ll no longer stare at white walls and ceilings for hours wondering how I can do my part to make sure change can happen, actions be held accountable, and how to better serve my community and others. While I still want to do things like be on a red team someday and what not that future I could do that in won’t exist if I don’t help stop what’s going on right now. Laws like the CFAA could and already do criminalise much of what I like to do. It’s used as a political weapon. One day I could be in the clear and the next be targeted. That’s just one example.

Direct action and help is the only thing I view as being able to prevent and tackle these issues.

While I’m on my walk as I work through other issues (e.g. where I belong in this world) I aim to find as many individuals, groups, organisations, non-profits, and so forth. Provide them help, see what they need, train people, and so on. Make it self-sustainable whatever system I leave behind. I’m on a walk, not making a home for myself. All of that I will do for free unless they want to donate or pay me, give me some food for my walk or something. If you’ve got someone or somewhere you want me to check out let me know: this is my current plan.

Another question I’m getting: how do I sustain myself on this walk? I honestly frankly don’t know yet beyond a few ideas (here, here). That’s before I hit the issue of how I feel about that even.

When I’m in a town I’ll likely be popping into bookstores and coffee shops to study, do some work there, if I find someone who needs help and such go do that. Probably going to sign up for a gym membership so I can take showers since I love showers. I’ll still be working on self-improvement, learning, and developing the skills needed to work on a red team someday. If someone would ever want to work with me after this that is since I realise how controversial a lot of this is?

I love a lot of things. I’d like to do my part to make sure the things I love survive. So that’s really it.

I’m in Washington, DC right now. I’ll be at PrivacyCon, ShmooCon, and the inauguration. If you want to talk about how to tackle the future and other issues you think I’d be interested in lets do it.